1812, by David Nevin

This week I finished 1812: A Novel. I doubt there will be a better set of years in my lifetime than 2012 - 2015 to read War-of-1812 books, because it's the 200th anniversary of all the battles of the war. Reading historical fiction about the events makes going to the reenactments twice as fun.

I am sure by now I have lost everyone due to the perceived dullness of the subject, so I am at liberty to say as much as I want! Ye courageous and interested souls who stand by will no doubt delight in my exposition.

The novel follows two important couples through the course of the war. First there comes hot-headed Andrew Jackson and his loving wife Rachel. Then comes wise James Madison and his beautiful, vivacious wife Dolley. Do you know what these people did throughout the war? Did you know, for example, that Jackson turned his own cannons on his mutinous troops and stared them down in front of lit fuses until the threat of desertion faded? Did you know Madison had to defeat a New England secessionist movement while trying to raise support for the war? I had no idea the war of 1812 was so interesting or important, and I was pleased to learn all this information and more in delightful fashion.

Nevin modernizes the dialogue to speed it up and make these historical legends come to life. Characters seem as real as Harry, Ron, and Hermione, and their innermost thoughts can be so private you sometimes feel as if you are intruding on great minds whose doubts you are not supposed to know about. I liked reading Madison's parts more because I loved his insight into the workings of American democracy. But Andrew Jackson's behavior and calculating warmaking strategery were always interesting.

Pictured: my choice to play A.J. 

I suspect Jackson, like Errol Flynn, had a more interesting life than what is portrayed in fiction. For example, the man accidentally marries Rachel before she secures a divorce from her first husband, then cantankorously spends the rest of his life battling and occasionally killing people who remind him of that fact too loudly. You've heard of Shakespearean insults? I want a copy of Jacksonian insults; I hear they were dazzling. Jackson sounds like the kind of guy you just can't capture on paper.

Any road, Jackson gets his moment of glory at the Battle of New Orleans and the calculations that went into that battle are fascinating. By far the most boring part of the book was the part where Nevin joyfully decides to describe every move of every battle in every detail. But if you take the time to read it you will be amazed at the preparation that went into each encounter. You will understand why the British army was the best in the world. You will understand what courage under fire really means. And you will be impressed with what men went through to keep America a free country.

So now it's time to go to some reenactments! The battle of the River Raisin ended 200 years ago yesterday and was commemorated with some awesome demonstrations in Monroe, Michigan. It was a catastrophic loss for the Americans made worse when Native Americans fighting for the British slaughtered wounded soldiers after the fighting. "Remember the Raisin!" became a rallying cry for the rest of the war and I daresay inspired the Texans to remember another entity with a strange name a mere twenty-three years later. This brings us to LESSON ONE, which is Name Your Landmarks Well. If people are going to use your river as a battle cry, give it a proper name like To Defeat The British, or We Are The Champions.

That should tide you history buffs over until I review Rome. If you want more, why don't you think about going to some awesome reenactments of the upcoming battles, which range from events on Lake Champlain to Niagara Falls to Baltimore to Washington, DC to New Orleans? History buffs only really get excited about centennials, and who knows where you'll be when the 300th rolls around! You can also check out Nevin's other books because they look fantastic if you like American history. I'm specifically thinking of Meriweather (I'm sure you know who that's about), Treason (a book about that bottom-feeder Aaron Burr), and Eagle's Cry, a book about the Louisiana purchase.

Seriously, you cannot want any more history than that. Read 1812 and get back to me!